Canned Tomatoes power new Honda to 84 Miles per gallon.... The RR

The UK Telegram reported yesterday that there is a new Honda engine available in 2012 that gets 84 mpg to a gallon of canned tomatoes. Tomatoes are naturally occurring in nature and can be farmed for higher productivity. Tomatoes actually take carbon dioxide out of the atmosphere as all plants require CO2 to live, thus killing two birds with one "mater."

Think about that! Just stop by the grocery store and grab a quart for about a dollar and drive another 21 miles, thus eventually eliminating all convenience stores as these "green tomato" cars become more popular. Grocery chains naturally are lining up to lobby for the new mater mobiles and are planning promotions like a free wide mouth funnel with a purchase of four quart sized cans.

In a related story the EPA, FDA and The President of The United States have all issued press releases declaring tomatoes unsafe. President Obama placed a moratorium on tomato gardening and said anyone caught buying, selling, growing or eating a tomato would be fined. He went on to say "just like coal and oil" which also are found, naturally on the planet, "tomatoes are not safe."

Reported by Mark Hall